Anil Thakraney: IPL 6 FAQs

24 May,2013

By Anil Thakraney

 

Okay, so as Indian television’s biggest annual reality show draws to a close, there are five pressing questions left unanswered. Let me try to deal with them.

 

Does the IPL have a future following the fixing scandal? Will it shut down?

There’s no way this tamasha is going to close shop, even if more skeletons tumble out of the stinking cupboard. Frankenstein BCCI has created a huge monster, and there’s no taming it now. The masses adore this monster because the IPL is fulltoo entertainment for the full family. It’s less about cricket and more about all the natak that goes around it. The TV ratings for this year have been good, and the stadia packed to the gills once again (the Delhi cricket ground was full house for the two play-offs despite the home team having been knocked out). And, Sreesanth & Co’s antics had zero effect on popularity. The IPL is here to stay. Period.

 

Will we see a clean IPL season next year?

Nope. T20 cricket is a fertile hunting ground for spot fixing, all it takes the bookies and their agents is a few dishonest players to co-operate. And this is particularly easy with the IPL because it’s teeming with players who have either been kicked out of the Indian team or aren’t talented enough to find a place in it. Also, India is a vastly corrupt nation, so to expect all our cricketers to be blessed with squeaky clean genes is being downright stupid. Some boys will sell their souls again, but I suspect they’ll behave more smartly than the three idiots: Sreesanth, Chandila and Chavan. Fixing will continue, the procedures will get refined.

 

Can’t the tournament host, the BCCI, clamp down on fixing?

Well, according to media reports, the BCCI boss’s darling ghar jamai is allegedly involved in the betting racket, haha. So to expect that organization to follow Gandhian principles is like expecting Phaneesh Murthy to practice celibacy for the rest of his life. It ain’t gonna happen. Therefore what I predict is hyperactive policing next year (match fixing seems to bother our cops more than rapes) and various sting operations by the maha excited media. And yet, the show will go on.

 

Aren’t sponsors and advertisers furious over the various IPL scandals? Should they not put pressure by threatening to pull out next year?

Well, ideally they should, but they won’t. That’s because the corporate suits aren’t out to make India a better place, that’s not in their mission statement. The advertisers are only and only interested in one thing: Eyeballs. As long as the IPL continues to draw in the audiences (which it will), the money will keep getting pumped in. In fact, secretly, some of the sponsors must be elated with all the scandals, they help keep the tournament buzzing on the news channels. That’s a much bigger bang for their buck.

 

Will Rajya Sabha MP Shri Sachin Tendulkar announce his retirement this Sunday?

No. He’ll be playing IPL 30 too. Am willing to, er, bet on it. 🙂

 

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One response to “Anil Thakraney: IPL 6 FAQs”

  1. Guest says:

    Our columnist has just lost a few shekels on the little master’s retirement.

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