Anil Thakraney: Block the gas bags

09 Jan,2013

By Anil Thakraney


Every second day, since the Delhi rape and murder, a deranged neta or a phony baba rears his ugly head. And lets off a wind blast that smells pretty foul. It’s okay, I guess. The Constitution allows every individual the right to free speech, and that includes farting, one might presume. The problem is: I am now beginning to suspect these dolts aren’t really crazy, they are using the gassy opportunity to acquire instant infamy. And notoriety sells too, we know that. It’s much more valuable than oblivion.


So, the familiar pattern unfolds: The man farts. The social media goes into a tizzy. The news channels go ballistic. Arnab Goswami and gang find juicy fodder to feed on. Screaming and jostling happens on TV debates. Next day, the newspapers do cover stories on it. The international media now gets interested; anything that makes Indians look like medieval fools sells like hot cakes in the west. On the weekend, the news mags dutifully carry forward this trash. And Mr Gas Bag, within a single week, turns into a huge celebrity. Phony babas acquire more followers. And opportunistic netas get quick OTS. And this sequence repeats itself.


How long will we allow ourselves to get fooled by these frauds? How long will we allow the world to laugh at our expense? How long will we let these charlatans use us? In fact, I must add here that some of the farts belted out by these buggers are criminal in nature, they abet rape. The media needs to ponder on this subject. My own view is that it’s time to put a stop to this crap. These gas bags must be banned from the mass media. Not able to air their stink, these sods will quit farting. As simple as that. That indeed might be the best way to stop this weekly nonsense.


And all the media time and space must be devoted to the rape trial itself. Even if it’s being held in-camera. We take our eyes off the ball, and the rotten system will slowdown once again.




PS: I couldn’t stop sniggering at this one. It appears the western world has decided to ape our desi ad guys. This is Brad Pitt endorsing Chanel No 5. Don’t miss the usual ad clichés, the ultra boring script and zero brand relevance. We get to watch this sort of rubbish celeb advertising all the time. People, our ‘talent’ is spreading far and wide.


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