[MxM Journalism Review] Mamata, the lone change-maker

05 Mar,2012

By Ranjona Banerji


Behold the lonely change-maker! She stands there victorious, having defeated the sinister dragon. She is righteous and she is also always right. But will that damn dragon let her do her job? In insidious and terrible ways, it hampers the change-maker’s progress.


What option does Mamata Banerjee have but to blame the erstwhile Left Front government and its remnants for everything that goes wrong in West Bengal? Oh sorry, I think the state has a new name but it is so like the old one that I’ve forgotten it.


So when infants die in a state hospital, you have to blame the Left Front government because the children were conceived during the Left’s reign. This is a little-known scientific fact which only the solitary change-maker has fully grasped. Your future is determined by where you were conceived (one more reason to blame your parents for whatever goes wrong in your life). Evidently, if you were conceived during a Left Front government’s rule, long life under someone else’s rule is inconceivable.


Then there’s rape. This is an awful thing – but only if it really happens. What if every rape in West Bengal is actually a conspiracy by the Left to malign the Solitary Change-Maker (if the Left deserves upper/lower case, surely so does she)? Therefore, if a woman gets gang-raped after leaving a pub, not only does one have to discuss her antecedents, behaviour and so on but also make it clear that the rape was not on the victim but an attempt to victimise the Government of Change.


Just after the Park Street Rape is the Burdwan Train Rape. This is even more conspiratorial. The so-called victim who claims to have been gang-raped in a train was a widow – whose now-deceased husband used to be a member of a Left party. If that is not an outright strategy to discredit the new government, then what is?


If rape is not bad enough, there’s murder. A member of one of those Left parties is hacked to death allegedly by members of the Party of Change. Oh, come on. Even those aliens buried in America are more believable than this theory.


The only possible taint on the Grand SC-M can come from the evil nephew who keeps going to botanical gardens after they’ve closed and demanding he be let in. Or driving on the wrong side of the road and then slapping a policeman who stops him. This nephew exists. But it is also possible that he will soon become a construct of the Communist imagination.


Behold the Solitary Change-Maker as she charges into the Valley of Death – cannons to the left of her, to the left of her, to the left of her.


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